Elijah
The high today was sixty-three degrees. It
wasn't frigid anymore, but it wasn't particularly warm either. There was
a reason for all of this, a calculated risk and a vert deliberate
thought process. The air was crisp but not cold. Not frigid, not
clinging, not desperate winter that hung on his skin and stuck in his
lungs and insisted, insisted you're dying, you're dying, this is the end like it always did. He picked today for a reason, he picked today because there were intentions that needed to be made clear.
He seemed dead set on trying to give himself the flu, though, what with the consistent water logging and drying out.
Elijah
had called Ian, explained that he wanted to head out, enjoy nature, see
new places because Colorado was full of nature and full of beautiful
places and he wanted to see the stars int he evening spiral upwards in
some perfect line and feel the air go electric and taste the slow and
dawning pieces of spring trying to peek through the stubborn cold. He
used less words, though. He'd said something akin to Hey, do you want to go to Forsythe Canyon with me? There's a waterfall.
That
was the point of this, you see. The waterfall was the entire point, and
there he was in the middle of the afternoon, ready for a small jaunt
into the wilderness, about a two and a half mile hike before they
actually would get to the destination. He'd been upfront about the
distance, almost expecting Ian to turn him down given that the drive to
the canyon was over an hour. He'd planned this, prepared for what could
be an all-day affair, or at least take up all the sunlit hours that they
could find.
So, this is where we open, with a young man in a parking lot, carrying little more than a backpack and determination.
Ian
Ian
didn't turn Elijah down. In fact, he agreed with very little
deliberation. The timing happened to coincide with his vacation, and Ian
seldom passed up an opportunity to go hiking in the Colorado landscape.
Especially these days.
He showed up to the parking lot on
time, after having driven out from the city. His car ticked gently as it
settled from use, chirping when he got out and locked the doors. He
didn't carry a pack, as Elijah did. They didn't really need two, though
he would probably offer to take it from him later. For now, he walked up
with a water bottle and a couple of high-end protein bars (the kind
without a huge list of dubious-sounding ingredients) and slipped them
into Elijah's pack. It was warm enough that he could dress fairly
light, so he had on a pair of 3/4 length hiking pants - made from some
slippery dark grey material and featuring a couple of cargo pockets -
and a t-shirt layered beneath a thin jacket of the same make and color
as his pants.
"Hey." His greeting was relaxed, but he seemed quiet (as he had at the park a few nights earlier.) "Ready to go?"
Assuming
Elijah was, Ian started off toward the trail at a brisk stride, tilting
his eyes up toward the sky and the rolling peaks of the Colorado
wilderness.
Elijah
It was easier to work here.
That much was starting to become clear to Elijah. He didn't have to
push through to see what was going on in the other reflections of the
world, but actually touching it- actually interacting with the denizens of the planes (knocking gently, asking politely, may I or come here
or any number of things. He didn't speak their language, something he
was willing and ready to remedy) it was much easier in a place that
wasn't stifling. He was starting to learn, starting to realize that
there was a difference between the cities and nature, starting to
realize that, in some lights, this was how it was meant to be. That this
was the world before we set limits, insisted upon our own dominion and
screamed no, you can't and built walls and barriers and separateness.
There was no give and take in a city, even a city like Denver. It didn't just apply to the spirit world either.
When
Ian arrived he got a smile, something generally pleased and ready to
actually venture out into the wilderness, even if Elijah's view of the
wilderness was still limited to an unkempt city park (such a city boy,
this one, something he inteded on remedying). Ian was good company in
situations like this, and there didn't seem to be the pressure to talk,
the need to talk. He was wearing shorts, something that came to his
knees and a fleece pullover. Watch in his pocket, still only accurate
twice a day (except for when Elijah was insistent that it keep time to
teh second, which it would. It was a symbol, a tool, and he made sure
his tools were well kept). Ready to go?
"Yeah," he
replied, that tiny bit of anticipation in his voice, that readiness to
be out in the thick of things, to challenge his perceptions, to go
trapped in every movement. He was different now, they both were. Elijah
was pushing, racing, reaching for more than just the unrest. His chaos
tested boundaries now, pushed against them and insisted we are more than this.
The
train was easy enough, which was good for Elijah because he wasn't the
experienced survivalist that Ian was (again, his survival skills were
limited to being able to navigate concrete and rebar forests.) He
continued on, keeping up with the brisk pace if only because he needed
to move. The canyon was blooming, blossoming into greens and buds and
careful bits of sprintime, life, creeping into the area. The area is
mostly evergreen- fir and spruce and smelling like the idea of
mountains. It's rocky, but not unweildy. The trail itself doesn't seem
difficult to follow (yet.)
Half a mile in, Elijah said something- "okay, so, basically the highlight of this place is the waterfall and the reservoir."
He pauses, inhales, focuses his attention, "I can't fucking stand water, and that's bullshit because I can objectively say this place is beautiful
and the overarching majesty and that stuff-" he's hurting for words,
that much is obvious. He's reaching, but he feels he owes Ian an
explanation, as though he owed anyone an explanation "-so I've recently
come to the conclusion that being scared that I'm going to drown in
anything deeper than a bathtub is bullshit, so... uh... yeah."
Ian
[Life 3, boosting perception, diff 6 -1 (primal resonance) -1 (focus)]
Dice: 3 d10 TN4 (4, 8, 10) ( success x 4 ) [WP]
Ian
[+2 Perception for 24 hours]
Ian
There
was something both animal and meditative in the way that Ian walked the
trail. The impossible ease and agility of his steps, long and relaxed,
punctuated by occasional bursts of athleticism. The two of them fell
into a companionable silence as they hiked, though Ian's focus was
anything but withdrawn. His attention was open and alert, taking in the
sights and sounds and smells of the landscape. At some point, perhaps,
Elijah might notice him drag his thumb over a sharp snag of stone. The
action opened a small wound, and Ian put it to his mouth as he walked,
closing his eyes as he tasted the familiar copper-salt tang of his own
blood.
Gradually, the details of the landscape became sharper,
clearer. Like watching a film shift from muted tones to vibrant color.
Ian stopped for a moment to look around, lips parted softly as he
breathed. Just... taking everything in.
It was like a kind of prayer, for him (though Ian would never have used that word.)
But
he didn't say anything about what he was doing. Maybe Elijah could
guess. Maybe he was busy focusing on his own journey. Regardless, they
hiked. Over stones and leaves and blanketing pine needles. Trees shifted
in the wind, the tips of their branches waving softly back and forth.
Animals scuttled nearby. A woodpecker tapped loudly on a rotting trunk,
the sound a staccato echo.
Half a mile in, Elijah finally
spoke. Ian glanced at him for a long moment. He could smell the
pheromones in Elijah's sweat. The fragrance of his shampoo. The complex
fibers that made up his hiking pack.
"It isn't bullshit.
Sometimes things happen to us that leave marks. Change the way our
instincts function. But it's good you're trying to deal with it. Water
is fucking amazing, and I promise I won't let you drown."
He gave a slow smile, at that.
Elijah
His
senses aren't like that. Sometimes, it's too much, but it doesn't
parallel the barest limits of human perception. The world is beautiful
like this. More color, more sound, more everything. There are smells,
there are smells everywhere. And whoever said that water didn't
have a smell was full of bullshit because there was the scent of
something running, flowing over rocks, running smooth what once was
rough.
He catches that small moment, the drag of his finger
over a jagged rock. Can't quite guess what he's doing, but has an
inkling. They're silent, and for his part, Elijah just lets everything be. Lets his senses be nowhere so he can be everywhere.
There are things he notices when he isn't trying to notice anything.
The world is loud, but his world has always been loud. Always been full
of sounds and sensations and, for his part, Elijah liked nature because
it was a different kind of noisy.
No insistence that he help, no incessant whispers of jump, do it, jump, it's so lonely here,
no wailing and keening, no dawning awareness of how the dead stay
locked in place by their passions. No, nature was quiet that way. It was
the kind of noisy that Elijah liked, the kind that was the appropriate
silent.
He smells clean. Or at least his clothes smell clean.
He showered this morning, is tinged by the wind and the road. He smells a
little like fabric softener and the remnants of Jenn's bodywash. He'd
spent the night at the apartment, likely slept in her bed though instead
of his. He did it a lot, woke up curled around the smaller woman and
took in her scent and revelled in the fact that he didn't wake up to her
looking concerned, that she didn't look at him with relief and insist you wouldn't wake up. A lot has changed over the course of a year, and he was better for it.
There
was a hurdle, though. And he could go somewhere beautiful to get past
it. Ian promises he won't let him drown, and Elijah smiles. At the
edges, but genuine. "I know you're good for it," the acceptance that Ian
was good for his word.
"Between drowning and Katrina it's always been a thing and I just figured that I was sick of it. I like pictures of water, so I figure maybe the actuality of water might not suck if the company is decent."
Ian
"Mm,
maybe not." Ian's smile lingered like a promise, soft and tipped at the
edges. He seemed different today. More like the person that Elijah had
seen on that mountain, but also... touched with a bit more color. He
pulled his water bottle free from Elijah's pack and took a deep drink.
When he replaced it, he gave the pack a light tug, as though to slightly
unbalance Elijah, then jogged ahead up the trail.
They were
getting closer to the water. The scent of it was strong in the air, as
was the echo of the distant falls. The closer they got, the more the
pressure changed (as warm air met cool.) It made the hair rise briefly
on Ian's arms.
"How've you been lately, by the way?"
Elijah
[There is totally not dread here. WP roll]
Dice: 5 d10 TN6 (3, 3, 8, 9, 9) ( success x 3 )
Elijah
He
was different today. He seemed to be himself, just a different facet.
Seeing Ian in nature was a pelasure, something that Elijah hadn't
considered an indulgence. He knew what to do in dance clubs and on phone
calls but here, there was something more genuine. Something that seemed
more open. One only gets to see pieces of Ian at a time, and this one?
Well, it was something that Elijah was steadily starting to find more
excuses to see.
They were getting close to the water, to the
falls that he had been both anxious and excited to be near. The air was
going cool and his heart was beating loud and his breathing was forced
low and deep and there was that moment that he ponders if he could turn
around, if hge should call it. But Ian pulled on his pack a little,
enough to make him lose a little bit of balance. Not much, not enough to
send him toppling, but enough to give him a head start.
Elijah
laughed, something unrestrained (because was he ever restrained?) and
pleased. He trots down the path, a bit more sure-footed than he had been
in the past. Actually capable of keeping up, even if he wasn't as agile as Ian he had the wherewithall to persevere.
How has he been?
"Decent.
Jenn and I had a huge talk about the nature of the universe and I may
have shown her the umbra, which she was strangely receptive to after she
stopped thinking I got her really high without her knowledge," he
doesn't seem as winded as he would be, though he does try to push
himself forward, to maybe get to reservoid and the waterfall before Ian
would. He knew better than to try, but what is the fun in just rolling
over and letting things pass him by?
"I tried to talk to Ari
about stuff but we got distracted- totally not my fault. But she was
pretty receptive so maybe she won't be so... y'know... bitey in an
unpleasant way."
Ian
"Distracted, huh," Ian
repeated the word with a dry inflection, inviting without pressing. His
thoughts lingered for a moment on Jenn. On the way Elijah described her
seemingly easy acceptance of something beyond what she'd always known to
be real. His pace slowed to a walk, letting his energy settle. "You're
lucky, I think. With Jenn. Not many people would be willing to see
that."
It was something he'd never attempted, himself. Sharing that piece of his life with someone who wasn't already Awake.
Elijah
"WE
hooked up, I asked if she was okay with this and she was sure and, uh,
yeah. That is a quick recipe to apparently hit Arionna's I'm going to show you how incredibly sure I am about this, how dare you question my motives buttons. I was not expecting that."
He
clarified, yes, but there was the question of Jenn and it does make
ELijah slow, choose his words a little more carefully, "we hit this
breaking point. I'd been really shady with her, she thought Kalen was an
abusive boyfriend because every time shit would go down I would
disappear, show back up withdrawn, and wouldn't talk to her about it."
Elijah slowed back to walking, though some part of him was excited.
Eagerly awaiting seeing this waterfall he'd been hoping for.
"It
was really scary. I mean, I had a push to do it, it was a big push,
but... like... I needed to do it. I was talking to- well, I guess it's
just another facet of myself, your avatar? I am on the fence if it's
something inside of you or outside or both or neither-" he could go on
like this for a day if he would let himself, but he shook his head
quickly, "anyway, I was telling myself that I couldn't do that and... it
wasn't a matter of not being capable or not being allowed, it was
having the drive to take that risk. Whether I decided to tell her or not
to tell her, I had to own that it was my choice and not one outside of
me, so... I made the call and she... it's all really new to her. I mean,
I understand that, she's got a lot of questions, and I wish I could
just... like... answer them, but I don't have those answers and it's great because..."
He falters, it's just for a second.
"I
hated lying to Jenn, and now I don't have to. With all the bullshit
we've been through, I would have hated that this is the reason she would
walk away."
Because it's there, in his voice, that he
expected Jenn to walk away. That, on a certain degree, he wanted Jenn to
walk away. Just like he'd wanted Kalen to walk away. To wash their
hands and say it was too much and just leave him to his poor decisions
and lack of expectations.
"I didn't tell her about you, so if
you want to let Jenn in on the big magical bag, that's totally your
call. She knows, so she's riding my ass now, it's kinda nice."
Ian
He
was quiet while Elijah spoke, letting him share what he wanted to
divulge. The two of them drew closer as they walked, but Ian didn't
attempt to bridge the gap with physical contact. He glanced at Elijah
once or twice, taking in the set of his features, the tension in his
posture, before returning his attention to the trail. He could hear the
waterfall rushing in the distance.
"I'll think about it," he
offered, in response to Elijah's reassurance that this secret was still
his to give away, if he wished. "You seem happier since you've told her.
I'm glad you did. Whatever anyone else thinks.
"And that doesn't surprise me. About Arionna. I'd be careful with her though. She's... volatile."
Elijah
"I am happier," he qualifies.
They're
getting closer, and his stomach is tense. There's a shift in body
chemistry. There's a shift that insists that his body might make a
demand of him soon enough to run, to stop, to not go any closer because
darling stupid boy this is dangerous! Ignorant child, this is the end,
didn't you remember? Didn't you hear? Everything screaming and tearing
apart, didn't you remember?
It's different, he reminds
himself. Doesn't make contact, doesn't reach out for comfort because he.
would. do. this. If he was going to face things down, there was a
degree of self-soothing that he was going to have to figure out. There's
finality in his posture, determination, a push that he be more than what he is.
Things
have changed about Elijah, and he is no longer content with formless
chaos. There has to be more, and that tempest tests the edges and dares
to spill over, take more than it is offered because this can't be all
there is, this can't be the end. He doesn't want it to be, and he's
starting to remember how much his will matters.
And he wouldn't be cowed by nature, he would exist with it.
He
doesn't respond yet, just nods. "Yeah," after a moment, "this just
feels like a bad decision. I think she has a boundary issue."
He
continues forward, and over the crest of a hill, down a rocky path,
something uneasy and not quite worn as the rest of it. There it was-
clear blue water. The water runs down from some source not quite in view
but it spills down rocks, stains the beaten area with moss and,
somewhere behind that beating crest there was an alcove behind it.
The
water is blue and clear, save for where it is dark and not. Save for
the places where it is deep, where when one swims they could feel it
grow cold and hint at the vast depths below.
Water is not to
be trifled with, but water is life. Is majesty. Is not an ally but not
an enemy, as much of nature is. (Maybe Ari had some points after all.
Things that get lost in her vitriol.)
Ian
If he'd wanted to, Ian could have helped Elijah.
There was a brief moment, watching him as they neared the water, when
the thought did cross his mind. Just a gentle touch - a blanket of
serenity to calm Elijah's thoughts. He'd done that sort of empathic
projection before. But he didn't do it now, because whatever Elijah was
feeling, it was his to feel. Even negative emotions held weight; held
meaning. However Elijah chose to process his fear was up to him.
(One does not cure a thing by pretending it isn't there.)
As
the trees opened up, Ian stepped out onto the riverbank and looked over the water, charting the course with his eyes. His hands settled on
his hips as he breathed, taking in the combined scents of the river and
the moss, the wet stones and the trees. His experience of the place was
far different from Elijah's. If anything, he seemed calmer for being
there.
"This is beautiful."
He turned around, shedding his jacket with a quick roll of his shoulders. "You okay?"
Elijah
[WP, diff 7- I can totally coexist with water]
Dice: 5 d10 TN7 (1, 2, 5, 6, 8) ( success x 1 )
Elijah
His breathing went shallow.
There
was a moment of watching him, those moments where it was hard to tell
if he was captivated by the world around him or if he was going to run.
If he was going to hide, if he was going to apologize for his behavior
because it was too much, this was too much, he'd made a bad decision but
it was all so beautiful. He inhales, though his breathing is
shallow, his arms crossed low against his ribs, protective, but there is
awe there. Yes, awe. The kind of awe that only came when Elijah was
looking at the other side of the universe, the mirror of their world.
Except
he was here. Except he was very firmly in the physical realm and he
could see the water and he could almost touch the river bank and he
didn't say anything at first, just walked cautiously. He wondered if
this was what Virginia looked like when it wasn't frozen over. Wondered
if he would have found that place beautiful instead of a constant,
painful memory. A coast ruined, or merely put back in a different
perspective.
He walked to a rock, ditched his backpack before
heading for the water. There isn't much color to his cheeks but there's a
smile on his face.
"I'm getting there," he said, "the pictures don't do it justice."
Ian
Getting there, Elijah said.
Ian
dropped his jacket on a dry rock and slid free of his shirt. There
didn't seem to be any question of whether or not he intended to go in
the water. They'd made the hike, after all. And it was
beautiful. So he pulled off his shoes and socks, fixing Elijah with a
little smile when his hands went to the front of his pants.
A
distraction? Maybe a little. Not enough make Elijah forget where they
were or what they were doing. Just enough to keep his thoughts grounded
in the here and now.
"How many people do you suppose come by here?"
It
was a rhetorical question. A moment later he was free of his clothes
and making his way down the steep bank toward the rushing current. When
he stepped into the water, the pull threatened to yank his foot out from
under him, but he kept his balance, toes digging into the polished
gravel until he felt sand beneath.
Elijah
[I CAN DO THIS! willpower again]
Dice: 5 d10 TN7 (3, 5, 6, 6, 10) ( success x 1 )
Elijah
He
needed something to be grounding. He needed something to keep him in
the here and now because what he would do hen he was nervous is be
anywhere but here. Anywhere but now, and what killed him, what kept him
in the past or flung him into a future he couldn't quite stomach. A
place full of possibilities when, realistically, he just needed to be in
the moment. When, realistically, he could have just been in the now.
Ian was good at keeping him in the now, at being present when he wanted to be anywhere but here.
Elijah
bit his lower lip, just enough of a grin, and there was a look back at
the water, at the rush, at the flow of things and he thought why not?
So, it is to be said that Elijah never one to turn down the opportunity
to take his clothes off. Truthfully enough, he rather enjoyed being in
nature, this was just another step, another jump to the appropriate
direction. He ditched his pull over, his shirt, bottoms- though he does
have to plop himself down on a rock to actually get his shoes off
because his boots are pretty well-laced. He lets out a little
over-dramatic grunt before heading down to the water.
He
stops, looking at it cautiously, as though it might very well reach up
and smack him or pull him under and he isn't certain, "I should just
jump in and get it over with." Elijah laughs, and surprisingly the sound
is genuine.
Ian
Ian hummed quietly. He didn't
offer any response to Elijah's claim, lest he unduly influence him one
way or the other. Instead he waded out into the river, holding his
balance against the current until the water reached up past his hips.
This was about as deep as the river got, so he stopped there in the
center of it, hands dipping past the surface to feel the way the water
slid through his fingers. It was cold. A shiver crawled up his spine as
his internal temperature adjusted to the new surroundings.
Then he looked at Elijah and dove under.
Elijah
[spending willpower, because he REALLY wants this to happen)
Elijah
He
took a step in, and it was cold. It seizes in his lungs and insists
that he shouldn't breathe, that this was all going to be over and it's
going to be just like the last time he did it. Elijah inhaled deep, and
remembered, remembered that water was more than just death. Remembers
that water has always been there, always heralded in a new chapter in
his life, gave him new meaning. Reminded him of purpose, of limitations
that he couldn't have, limitations that were self-imposed bullshit and
this?
No, this was not going to keep him held back. he wasn't
going to be embraced by the past. Water had a new context, he had to let
it be something new. He had to let things go, and he grinned. Ian want
under and his heart beat a little faster, insisted that Ian wouldn't
come back up but- but he knew better.
Soon enough he'd waded
out to the middle of the river, leaned back and took a deep breath and
went under. Let himself drift for a second before he came up, gasping,
eyes wide, shocked, and there's that moment when he can't believe he
does, but mostly-
"Fuck!"
He can't believe it's so cold. Elijah laughs anyway.
Ian
It
wasn't really deep enough to drown in. Not at their height. But Ian
stayed under for a while, opening his eyes against the liquid sting of
the water. The rocks in the riverbed were painted with streaks of
refracted sunlight. Eventually his chest started to burn for lack of
oxygen, and he broke the surface with a deep breath.
He'd cut
his hair recently, so there wasn't really enough of it to hang in his
eyes. He ran a hand across it anyway, shedding stray droplets down his
arm.
He laughed at Elijah's punctuated curse, but didn't
speak. Instead he leaned back into the current and let it take him past
the spot where Elijah had floated. Then he rolled back in a
reverse-somersault with his feet out of the water and his hands raking
little divots in the riverbed. There was a strong temptation to grab
Elijah's ankle and pull him under, but he resisted. When he came back
up, he leaned over and kissed him at the juncture beneath his ear and
the corner of his jaw.
Elijah
[I can totally take you under. Kind of. Maybe.]
Dice: 2 d10 TN6 (7, 9) ( success x 2 )
Elijah
See,
look, Ian was being grounding. There was a moment when he could feel
the water around him, could feel his heart beating too hard and too fast
and he drew in a deep breath, closed his eyes for a brief moment only
in time to watch Ian. he was graceful, he was always graceful but
watching him in water was captivating. For a moment it was easy enough
to forget that they were in the middle of a freezing cold, strangely
invigorating river. Elijah ran his hands through his hair, long enough
that it does run the risk of being in his face if he wasn't careful. All
cobalt blues and indigo up his right side, it's a damn shame he doesn't
hand water well because the young man was captivating in a more natural
setting. It was different, when the only flash of the lights is the
rustle of leaves shifting and causing dappled changes. When the only
sound was the rush of water over rocks.
Ian was grounding,
there was touch, there was a moment when he leaned in, kissed the place
just nearly on his jawline but not quite. He tipped his head to the
side, a smile on his face, something that turned to a grin. Something
that was met with a slight chuckle, a little laugh that was mirthful
even though his mind was trying its best to cut through every moment
that he was having. He turned, just a little, just enough. There was
warmth in his cheeks, and for a second the world went slow.
Then, it came back.
There
was that grin on his face, playful and delighted. His heart was still
pounding too loud in his ears, but he decided to give it a new reason.
He gives Ian all of two seconds warning. "Take a breath," he insists.
Takes a second to turn, to pounce, and he knows that Ian is giving in,
gives way, lets him take the other man under and Elijah holds onto his
shoulders, uses his weight to take him under, but he takes care of his
needs. He pushes his lips to Ian's, in the event that he didn't take a
breath in time, Elijah had determined that he should be prepared.
Or, perhaps, he just wanted to kiss someone under water.
Ian
Elijah
gave him a warning, though it wasn't really necessary. Ian felt the way
Elijah's pulse jumped beneath his skin; saw the glimmering look in his
green eyes (the hues were so vibrant against the stark blue of the
water) and knew by his shifting posture that he was about to pounce. All
the same, he feigned a subtly confused expression, and when Elijah
latched onto him and threw his weight back, Ian let himself be carried
with it. They slid under, floating down with the current. Ian turned in
Elijah's arms, freeing one of his hands to grasp the back of Elijah's
neck. When they kissed, he tasted the river. It was cold and warm all at
once.
Eventually they came back up further downstream. The
water was shallower, enough so that the line of it skimmed just shy of
revealing enough of their bodies to scandalize onlookers.
Not that either of them cared about that. And no one was around anyway.
"Glad we came?"
Elijah
Eventually,
they did come up, further downstream. There was that moment, the
feeling of being washed down stream, a different kind of letting go and
just letting the water take him where it pleased. He didn't seem to
care, didn't fret too terribly hard on what was going on. Didn't think
of anything except the fact that the water was cold and the gravel was
smooth in some ways and Ian's skin was a contrast against things that
felt almost ethereal.
They come back up, Elijah takes a breath
and his eyes lock with Ian's. All bright green, like the leaves, cheeks
flushed. He can feel the air agains this skin, feels the flow of water
against his skin and the line that just barely kept them concealed.
Barely. There's that grin on his face, his constant companion. He
doesn't have time to be afraid, he doesn't have time to be preoccupied
with the past. Not when the now was so captivating. Now when the here
and now felt right.
"It was worth the drive," he ran
his hand over Ian's hair before moving in, kissing his lips with quiet
fervor. Not with desperation. Not with that terrible dawning, drowning
dread. Not reaching for something else to feel but, rather, to be in the
now with a person. With someone who was worth the attention. It didn't
matter what happened at that juncture- if they laid in the water and let
the world wash down. It didn't matter if they enjoyed each other in a
more carnal sense. They could have done anything at that juncture and
Elijah would have been able to foci, would have reveled in it because
water was different now.
No, not quite, but it was getting
there. A thing of transition, a thing of liberation instead of endings,
because endings were beginnings and they were all inter changeable.
Elijah stayed until he was breathless, until the water got too cold and
he couldn't stand it for completely different reasons.
